good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I love you.
Bad choice
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
