Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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