dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
