This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
