my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
wow bdsm is so cute
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