Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
