I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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