Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
