she was so not down for the gang bang
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize