I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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