I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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