you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
