Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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