So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize