Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I currently don't understand fingers.
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