is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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