i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
