I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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