I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
