Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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