If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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