I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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