My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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