Its about making memories worth repressing
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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