So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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