you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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