i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
