She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
