There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
