i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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