They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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