spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
