she kept yelling 'call me bella'
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize