I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
