laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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