Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize