Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
