similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
