Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
