wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
