Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize