Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
His hands were made for my vagina.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
