Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Randomize
