Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
