plz talk dirty to me
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
of course. lets lasso hookers.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Randomize
