Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize