Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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