It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
