i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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