I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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