Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize